TriDadio the alter ego of Tony D. Cross
Ramblings, thoughts, and stories and tall tales from the edge of the Foster/Adopt Dad zone
Come along on our journey
About us:
How we met and how God has moved us thoughout our marriage.
Why did we go into foster care?
The story of seeing first hand a need that we couldn’t ignore.
Some of the milestones in our life.
We’ve had some ups and downs like any married couple and here are just a few.
What people say about us
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Blah, blah, blah
Michelle P.
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Welcome to their chaotic life.
Willie W.
From our blog
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Everyone needs a Sheppy
First, I’ll have to admit that fostering was not easy but I am glad that is the direction that we followed. That is because it brought us and you together Shep. From your birth to 2.5 months you had lost your voice in the world. That was because your bio family didn’t feed or love…
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8 is Great: Happy Birthday
You had just turned three, and you loved firetrucks. We had just happened to live near a fire station at the time and got a chance on your birthday to tour and sit in a firetruck. You were in heaven. Fast forward to 2023 and you have turned 8 and are growing in self-confidence and…
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You’re 17 Birthday Boy
There’s a lot to be said when you are the baby of the family and then one day you are asked to become the middle child due to your parents jumping into foster care. It really overturns your world and your perspective, especially when there is five and ten years difference between you and your…
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the dash
I started to really look hard at my time on earth now and for what I have remaining, may I not waste the dash but be more impactful and influential in the remaining days that God allows me to have.
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Happy Gotcha Day SG!!
we had gathered at the courthouse for the TPR (termination of parental rights) trial in the summer of 2019
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Sydney & Zachery (do the work)
Family and friends, Today is a truly special day as we gather here to celebrate the start of a beautiful journey. It is a day filled with joy, laughter, and the promise of a beautiful future together. As Syd’s Dad it is an honor for me to stand before you and share a few words…
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May 7th Foster care myths
Myth: Foster children are difficult and hard to manage.
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Baby girl no more-look at you
Wow, what can I say I guess that time flies by when you are having fun. I know you’ve heard your mom and I say this but it does truly seem like yesterday when you were born and just coming home from the hospital. You are the 2nd oldest, you used to be the middle…
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Foster Care Myths
cost of caring for a child, but most foster parents do it because they want to help children in need. In all actuality, it comes out to less than $.50 per hour.
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May 3rd: foster care awareness month
One great time in our foster care journey was when we had 4 children under the age of 6 in our home.
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May 2nd: Foster care awareness our story
Foster care for use started in 2017 but rewind that back to our first awareness and we would tell you 2009. We went to an adoption and foster care conference at Hillcrest Baptist church. We were curious, interested but clueless for sure. Fast forward to 2016 when as kindergarten Sunday school teachers saw the need…
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May is National Foster Care Month
How do you use social media? For us it all began when we taught Sunday school for kindergarteners and we met these little ones who were coming to church with their foster parents or home parents. They looked like any other child, nothing made them stand out particularly but it was the fact that they…
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My biggest career move
Describe a decision you made in the past that helped you learn or grow. So, back in 2005 I was in the medical field and getting ready to test for my registry exam in vascular ultrasound. I really loved helping others in the medical field but I really got fed up with the mess that…
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3 things that make me nervous
The main thing that makes me nervous is a failure to provide for my family. I put them in three buckets.
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Ugg, today really?
Now, it’s like drinking from a fire hydrant in terms of learning child development and trust based relational instruction.
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Mentorship
Describe a positive thing a family member has done for you.
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10 years from now
“Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit”— yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.”…
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My five everyday things that bring me happiness
The “good morning” from my toddler: SG is so animated in her expressions and she will scream, “Good morning Daddy” and that just ramps up my mood and allows confirmation of the journey we have taken through foster care and adoption. I’m truly blessed.
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Why does a 52 year old Dad run with a stroller?
Hey friends! Today, I want to talk about something that has been such a special part of my life – stroller runs with my children. When we started fostering, I would take them on runs in their stroller and it quickly became one of my favorite ways to bond with them. Not only is it…
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Adoption: Biblical
James 1:27 says, “Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.”
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Meet the Robinsons & adoption
Foster care and adoption has really made me a better disciple of Jesus, husband, and ultimately a better father.
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Regrets
Not understanding the need for foster care and adoption in society and how they could have helped address this issue.
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Five Reasons not to become a foster parent
First, foster parenting can be emotionally and mentally taxing.
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We are benifactors
In addition, adopting can be a very rewarding experience for the entire family. Adopted children often bring a new perspective and new love to the family. Adoptive parents often find that the joy of parenting is even greater when they are raising a child who they have chosen to love and care for.
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Give Thanks
Since we have been fostering and adopting, I can see how much I’ve grown and continue to grow as a husband and dad.
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Someone to believe in you
Parents who foster and who have adopted need encouragement and someone to believe in their mission and family
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The Three Types of People Needed
I had these archetypes in my life as I grew up it was just that I didn’t realize them or even comprehend them.
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Love isn’t enough
The idea that once they are adopted and you love on them then all of their past traumas and neglect will just go “poof”. Such thinking is what leads to frustration for those parents who do love on them with such a agape love that it hurts and yet issues pop up and happen.
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The F(oster kid) word and hindsight bias
hindsight biasthe tendency, after an event has occurred, to overestimate the extent to which the outcome could have been foreseen. Hindsight bias stems from (a) cognitive inputs—people selectively recall information consistent with what they now know to be true; (b) metacognitive inputs—people may misattribute their ease of understanding an outcome to its assumed prior likelihood;…
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My mini graduate
We never started fostering to adopt, adoption was the end to the means of abandonment due to the deep addictions and other obstacles on the road to reunification.
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Hold me to the fire
I’ve got to keep the streak alive.
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Progress not perfection
But what we really see in most things from the world of online friends is the best side, not the struggle, or what we see is a facade put up to mask the hurt and pain or to create an illusion of our society’s perception of success.
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Tribes
I’ll tell you that as a man I am and have been the last to ask for help when I need it most. Now, I do ask for help from Carla, my wife but I’m talking about the kind of help in dealing with things men go through. My wife will talk to her friends…
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Solutions
I know that we as humans can figure out how to embrace those who are vulnerable to abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, and more by using data that is spatially enabled to maybe figure out where communities and churches can be a lifeline to those who are hurting and possible prevent further escalation and end in…
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It takes a special person
You and Carla are “Special” people, if you mean by “special” you mean crazy. I agree.
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Children were made to thrive
The youngest TED speaker had a great TED talk about Children thriving and how the first 5 years are crucial to an overall development that will often set up their future as teenagers and adults.
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Take a deep breath
child is different and each child is unique, especially in the eyes of our great and mighty God
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Fathers, DNA not required
While asking for prayer a little girl stood up and asked to be reunited to her mother.
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We Need You! (now is your chance)
My vision is for churches to send out fostering families from their churches like they do when they send out missionaries to new areas as church plants or countries to share the gospel.
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What if you said YES
What would it be like for you if you said yes to foster care?
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Hey Wewoo, I wuv oou!
So, imagine that the only time you as a toddler see any law enforcement is during times that they have been called to your home to address a complaint or some illegal activity. Also imagine that you are removed as a toddler and the blue lights or patrol cars are a reminder of that trauma,…
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3 Things You Can Only Learn As You Get Older
“There is a person, an 80-year old version of yourself, that is rooting hard for you to make good decisions today.”
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Is it worth it?
Is it worth fostering? The answer is yes. I pray every day that God will allow me to be comfortable with being uncomfortable.
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Jesus and children-learning to abide and engage in a culture of ME
Give justice to the weak and the fatherless; maintain the right of the afflicted and the destitute. Psalm 82:3 ESV
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Race report and lowdown (the finish line is just around the corner)
Well, I’ve had a week or so to rest, repair and ruminate on last Saturday’s Ironman Gulf Coast 70.3 also known as the Gulf Roast. Going into the race I was very optimistic and enthusiastic about racing my 1st triathlon since 2014 and the longest distance to date. I arrived on Friday afternoon without…
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Letter to my oldest daughter (Leave your mark on the world)
One of these three things is going on in and around your life: you are either in a storm, coming out of a storm, or you are about to go through a storm. Storms are not bad in themselves, it is all in how we handle those situations. Romans 8:28 is a good reference.
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Resting and Triathlon
I write this as I am trying to get over a respiratory issue that hit me late Thursday and Friday of last week. I’m not the one in the family that is prone to get sick, on the contrary, I am the one who doesn’t get sick. As I have been training for my first…
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May the 4th be with you: Mandalorians get it
Mandalorians believe that children are the future of their culture, and they place a great deal of importance on raising them to become strong and honorable adults.
